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Have you made your final arrangements?
Roy and I got a call from a cemetary today. Apparently, the economy is even affecting the afterlife? Ah, not even the dead are dying to do business (ba-duh-cha!). But it did spark some interesting ideas in our house.
Idea 1 (Roy's)- What if we made a hobby of buying tombstones for ourselves, and then when we died we could put them all up on our little plot of land? (Installation Art)
Idea 2 (Mandie's)- What if we made a hobby of buying cemetary plots all around the country, and then we could own acres of land in small increments? (Landowners!)
Idea 3 (ours)- What are we supposed to do if one of us kicks it?
My plan should Roy kick it:
- suicide watch!
- cutting off his hand to keep as a mummy hand (I don't think this is legal)
- And what do I do with the rest of him?
- Selling everything except what will fit in the jeep.
- Bruce and I move far away and hide from the world because we hates it!
Now, should I kick it, it's both easier and more difficult...yes, simultaniously. Someone must figure out how to turn my skull into a candy dish. Also, someone must figure out how to feed the rest of me to sharks (that's recycling). Those are hard things. Easy things are--Roy should be okay after a period of mourning. Do not call him or talk to him to ask him "how are things?" He will get annoyed. That's a fact. Leave Roy alone. He'll find a nice girl and all will be well.
(I of course will be ranting somewhere in the backwoods, and/or running around nekkid and dirty with my dog.)
I might be doing that anyway soon. Roy leaves for 2 weeks tomorrow. Sad Mandie. Sad, sad Mandie.
Side note: why is it that facebook sometimes posts that I post things to lj, but sometimes not? Is it just fickle, or is there some secret that I don't know?
Idea 1 (Roy's)- What if we made a hobby of buying tombstones for ourselves, and then when we died we could put them all up on our little plot of land? (Installation Art)
Idea 2 (Mandie's)- What if we made a hobby of buying cemetary plots all around the country, and then we could own acres of land in small increments? (Landowners!)
Idea 3 (ours)- What are we supposed to do if one of us kicks it?
My plan should Roy kick it:
- suicide watch!
- cutting off his hand to keep as a mummy hand (I don't think this is legal)
- And what do I do with the rest of him?
- Selling everything except what will fit in the jeep.
- Bruce and I move far away and hide from the world because we hates it!
Now, should I kick it, it's both easier and more difficult...yes, simultaniously. Someone must figure out how to turn my skull into a candy dish. Also, someone must figure out how to feed the rest of me to sharks (that's recycling). Those are hard things. Easy things are--Roy should be okay after a period of mourning. Do not call him or talk to him to ask him "how are things?" He will get annoyed. That's a fact. Leave Roy alone. He'll find a nice girl and all will be well.
(I of course will be ranting somewhere in the backwoods, and/or running around nekkid and dirty with my dog.)
I might be doing that anyway soon. Roy leaves for 2 weeks tomorrow. Sad Mandie. Sad, sad Mandie.
Side note: why is it that facebook sometimes posts that I post things to lj, but sometimes not? Is it just fickle, or is there some secret that I don't know?
Facebook dilemma....