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Aug. 4th, 2005

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I hurt, I hurt!

http://www.engrish.com/

title or description

And they sell T-shirts!
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I am so sorry to ask, but someone else please look at this (ASHITERU ENGRISH!)

http://americaninlebanon.blogspot.com/2005/07/backstroke-of-west.html


And tell me if I am supposed to be laughing this fucking hard...this is the funniest shit I have seen in a long time. I am still, literally, crying, and I look like a dork because I can't stop and I'm sitting all alone in my cube at work. WHY?????!??!? I want this movie so bad now. SO BAD!!!! If I laugh myself to death right now please refer back to my last will and testement. I'm getting stomache cramps.

P.S. "Backstroke of the West" is the chinese translation of "Revenge of the Sith"...and it keeps getting funnier from there.

Aug. 1st, 2005

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In order to not be deemed a larouche (some good shite by Koch, who I love, despite all early poems)

What is American About American Poetry?
Kenneth Koch


Ice is like prose; fire is like poetry. But neither melts nor goes out. Ideally (or unideally, some would say) they generally ignore each other's existence.
Rhyme is like a ball that bounces not in the same place but at least in another place where it can bounce.

Poets who write every day also write every year, which is the important thing for poetry.

The poet is the unacknowledged impersonator of the greatest unborn actors of his time.

The Romantic movement left, when it departed, a tremendous gap in poetry which could be filled by criticism and by literary theory but which would be better left alone.

Rome inspired architects and sculptors and painters; the Lake Country inspired poets. Milton inspired Keats. Perugino taught Raphael. Blake gave ideas to Yeats. Sciascia read Chroniques italiennes once every year. Byron learned something from Pope. Even the most unsentimental person is glad to see his home country again.

A tapestry is not like a lot of little poems woven together but like one big poem being taken apart.

Starting off as an Irish poet, one has a temperamental and geographical advantage. Starting off as a French poet, one incites overwhelming curiosity as to what can be done. Starting off as an American poet, one begins to develop a kind of self-consciousness that may quickly lead to genius or to nothing.

Would that he had blotted a thousand! "perfection" is wonderful in poetry but Shakespeare is good enough— one reads on!

There are three Testaments and one is illegible.

The iris is a flower that is part meridian, a ghost come bearing you a villanelle.

What is the matter with having a subject? Wittgenstein says, "There are no subjects in the world; a subject is a limitation of the world." In fact our subject is all around us like a mail-order winter that we carelessly sent in a request for when it seemed it would always be spring.

Eve was the first animal. Therefore she could not have been Eve, and Adam could not have written poetry. Adam could not write poetry unless there was a human Eve. Thousands of years later, there was: Eve de Montmorency. But she didn't encourage the production of poetry. She said I'll kill anyone who writes me a poem. I like life to be real! Inspired all the same, a few poets began writing "free verse" (and it was pretty good) which she was unable to recognize as poetry. Meanwhile, back in the Garden of Eden, Eve woke up. She was a fox no more, but a woman, and a ravishing one! Adam saw her and became terribly excited. Without willing to or wishing to at all (for who could know the consequences?) he fell to one knee, held out his hands and recited: Roses are red, violets are blue. Yes, what's the rest? Eve said. I don't know Adam said. I'm not yet fully a poet. That's as far as I've got. So far, so good, Eve said, and she loved him with a new ardency that night. From their union were born Abel and Cain, who represented two dissenting schools of criticism: Abel, the "inspirational let-yourself-go, just SAY it, let it all hang out, or blossom! Lyrical School"; Cain, the party of more rigorously crafted delight, a sylvan Valery: l'inspiration n'est pour rien— le travail, en poesie, est tout! They fought and killed eachother many times, while Eve brought forth more children in sorrow, and Adam, his body aching, tilled the land.

Once I taught polar bears to write poetry. After class each week (it was once a week) I came home to bed. The work was extremely tiring. The bears tried to maul me and for months refused to write a single word. If refused is the right term to use for creatures who had no idea what I was doing and what I wanted them to do. One day, however, it was in early April, when the snow had begun to melt and the cities were full of bright visions on windowglass, the bears grew quieter and I believed that I had begun to get through to them. One female bear came up to me and placed her left paw on top of my head. Her mouth was open and her very red tongue was hanging out. I realized that she, and the other bears, must be thirsty, so I procured for them several barrels of water. They drank it thirstily and looked up at me from time to time to gratefully but even then they wrote no poems. They never did write a word. Still I don't think this teaching was a waste of time, and I'm planning on continuing it if I have the necessary strength. For hard and exhausting it is to attempt something one knows it is impossible to do— but what if one day those bears actually started to write? I think would all put down our Stefan George and our Yeats and pay attention! What wonders might be disclosed! What dreams of bears!

Reading is done in the immediate past, writing in the immediate future.

The world never tires of bad poetry, and for this reason we have come to this garden, which is in another world.

Jul. 9th, 2005

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If I had that "embarassment" button to stop me

I would not be writing to say that all the crazy doin it that's been rockin' the south park daily and nightly for like three weeks, well...it has left me with a wrist injury. That's right! I have a repetative motion injury from the freaky naughty lovin. My left wrist hurts like a sumbitch, and it's all wrapped up tight in an ace bandage. So, for all ya'll please take this as a warning: too much cowgirl = a sprain you don't wanna have to explain at the student health center. Yee haw and yippie kye aye! (at least it wasn't reverse cowgirl? and my jaw seems to be fine.)

Now who is thinking TMI (too much information...I didn't say TMJ - I sz my jaw is fine), can I see a show of hands? (if you need to throw up, please move away from your keyboard, I'm pretty sure that could mess up your computer.)

Lata parders! (ka pow pow! "Rassafrakin")


"I got my hat I got my horse, I'm gonna ride out into the next town; spend all my money on absolutely nothing, don't need no man to pay for anything. I got no shame, nobody knows my name; I'm gonna ride out into the next town. Pecos Bill, Ol' Hank hold on, I'm a female cowpoke with a song..."

HEH COWPOKE!!! (hootypoke) "That's what she said!"

Jul. 1st, 2005

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I am madly in love.

With my husband...heh. How'd that happen? I have actually been blushing. Forget the sexy barista, I have a new crush. (Incidentally, this happens quite a bit; every few months, I get obsessed with the R and get all giggly. This is BAD though, I haven't been this smitten for quite a while. I AM IN DEEP SMIT.) So, if we don't answer the phone, forgive. If we don't show up to events, forgive. If we don't leave the house, we may have killed each other somehow...so check up on us.

HE is SO FREAKING HOT!(and naughty...hehe. Dammit I'm blushing again.)

what's wrong with me?

Jun. 17th, 2005

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DUH...A quiz re: what kind of boy I like.

kewl
You like the trouble making types.


What kind of guy are you most attracted to? (CUTE anime pics)
brought to you by Quizilla

Apr. 25th, 2005

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Yaoi obsession part deux

I can't sleep, and I can't keep my hands off of Roy...what is wrong with me!???

Dammit, dammit, dammit.

On an up note, I am learning some Japanese from watching endless loops of Gravitation.

Kimi o daisuke --I love you
Ne ko ni natte ai ni natee --Hey,I want it to be a crush then love
Nee oikakete oikakete--hey, chase me, chase me!
Oni-san - big brother
oni-chan - cute big brother
Baku - idiot, moron, brat, and the like.

My face hurts from smiling at pretty boys in love.

Other things I have learned, thanks to Gravitation...
1. somewhere a flying panda always comes into play
2. I like having my hair pulled
3. I like mean boys who tell me to "fuck off" and then touch me inappropriately (that's all a bit sadistic...I am appropriately ashamed).
4. It's hard to grade papers when cartoons are kissing.
5. translation is really, really difficult.
6. I want pink hair! (It's kinda pink right now.)
7. I am prone to obsession.
8. I should be allowed to sing in a major j-pop band.
9. My band is headed for career failure. I'll never be as good as Ryuchi Sakama. But I'm sure I'm better than Shuichi...somebody get me a tall broody man to love me inappropriately (oh, wait! I've got one.)
10.All Americans carry guns...really (according to the Japanese).

I like the words appropriate/inappropriate...although ultimately they don't mean squat, cause "I do what I want!!" Unless I get caught, then I get yelled at.

Apr. 11th, 2005

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Last one of the night...I'm trying to catch up.

And since I have nothing in particular to talk about, I thought I'd just let the quizzes serve as writing prompts.

The info below isn't really surprising:





Your Seduction Style: The Dandy





You're a non-traditionalist, not limited by gender roles or expectations.
Your sexuality is more fluid than that - and you defy labels or categories.
It's hard to pin you down, and that's what's fascinating about you.
You have the psychology of both a male and a female, and you can relate to anyone.





A dandy or a fop? Could go either way really. Look at me defying labels with my label defyingness. That really isn't true. The truth is that my seduction style is anti-seductive. I am a hopeless unromantic. Love is cheezy, pick-uplines are cheezier (15% real cheddar, that's why the "z"), and all of it is hilarious. Honesty is more charming than crap, and folk respond pretty well to it (most of the time). Here's a good pickup line: "Nice ass! Wanna hump?" HA! Oh, I'm sad really. (I'm sure it works...ask me how I know.)

I'm sleepy now, or I'd try to say something GENIUS about this. Eh.