ON ACCEPTING THE FRENCH IDEA OF GENIUS:

Obs. nonce-wd.


That corrupts or ruins women.

[1780 M. MADAN (title) Thelyphthora; or, A Treatise on Female Ruin, in its Causes, Effects, Consequences, Prevention, and Remedy.] 1794 MATHIAS Purs. Lit. I. 160 Must I with Madan, bent on gospel truth, In Thelypthoric lore instruct our youth.


Me likey word. Roy is thelyphthoric in that he ruint me for all other mens (with his sexy and whatnot). I is ruint. RUINT! Wait is ruint a word? Okay, the oed says NO, not a word. hmmm... but ruinated is! I is ruinated! (That sounds funny... I ruinated my panties when I urinated in them. ha hahahahaha! Not really. I'm not that old.)

You scored as Severus Snape. Well you're a tricky one aren't you? Nobody quite has you figured out and you'd probably prefer it stayed that way. That said you are a formidable force by anyone's reckoning, but there is certainly more to you than a frosty exterior and a bitter temper. </td> Severus Snape 90% Ginny Weasley 85% Ron Weasley 80% Harry Potter 80% Remus Lupin 80% Albus Dumbledore 75% Sirius Black 65% Hermione Granger 60% Draco Malfoy 55% Lord Voldemort 55% Your Harry Potter Alter Ego Is...? created with QuizFarm.com

#4. Bad temper.
#8. Unfocused rage.
#12. Has a tendency to hit or throw things.

I am a very, very horrible girl, who does very, very horrible things. But...maybe people do just have to throw down once in a while. The good news is, all is quiet on the home front, all is lovey albiet the slightly guilty feeling eminating through the air. I am indeed a lucky girl, for many reasons.
Reason One: We got it all out.
Reason Two: There are no real witnesses, save for one small dog.
Reason 3: There's no permanent damage (mental, emotional or physical)
Reason Four: We forgive nicely, and will eat ice cream together.

Still guilty feeling, but at least we got it out of our systems? Who knows...everybody fights sometimes.

Awww. They missed me. I feel special, no really I do. And I am kinda sad about not going, because I like a good story. So here's Roy's report on the 18th consecutive year of the Luzerne Canoe Trip, as filtered through Mandie.

Day one, Jon Jon and his friend (who is like jon jon without the charm...wrap your heads around that one ladies--A, Roy sz you met him...Dan, the guy that was with jon jon on your trip to Romeo), built a Tiki bar from things they found in the yard. The big surprise of the weekend was that the tiki bar stayed up, that it didn't get tossed directly in the fire, and that no one set it on fire at all. This is probebly because Scott's brother, the pyro, was at home with his wife and new baby. Roy got toasted, and was mixing his alcohol, and he only ate McDonald's all day, so...hungry, dehydrated, sleeping in a hot tent, and drunk off his ass...roy puked in the yard. (Roy never throws up, so this too is a surprise). At least he didn't throw up in the tent. Poor bee bee. Plus his glasses broke...sux.

Day two, Roy feels like crap and decides not to drink, good call Roy. The canoe trip was scheduled for 3 hours, so factoring in binger breaks, futzing around and general mayhem, they made good time at just under 7 hours. A sober Roy gets to watch the insanity unfold. Hot girls flirt with him, scott hits on his own cousin (not blood related), and three of them decide that launching a canoe down a 45 degree embankment is a great idea. They ask ROy to play too, but he uses me as his excuse..."Nah, sorry guys, Mandie made me promise not to do anything this obviously stupid and dangerous." Good boy, we ain't got insurance, and I don't mind coming off as the nagging wife in instances like that. They say, arright, suit yerself, fill the canoe halfway up with water (you know, for safety purposes and speed) and launch...surprisingly it worked, go figure. Eh, there's a first time for everything. Later that night...jon jon's friend Dan almost got the shit kicked out of him by a whiskey drunk, scary, uncle Rog. The cops came. Hijinx ensued. Rog slapped jon jon in the head after they got in a fight over who was more drunkerer. And Roy was granted "HOnorary Steinbrink" Status. Way to go Roy, now you too can be loud, throw things in the fire, and start fights for no reason. I'm so proud. Incidentally, this makes me a Steinbrink-in-law, so I am lucky too.

Day Three: Roy chased a rooster and fed it some beer, then he got in the car, visited the outlet bookstore, and came home to a waiting Mandie.

The End of the LUzerne Saga (in which many drunk men try to score at MaDeeters but there are no takers)...oh what a riveting tale it was.

In other news...Sammi, escape artiste extraordinare, somehow escaped from both the yard and the house this time (can't even think of how to explain that one!), and was found crossing the street, and covered in poo by big and little bob, neither of which recognized her immediately. "Hey, somebody's dog...wait, that's our dog!"
Past exploits of Sammi, the labrador Houdini, include "The great bank heist," "The raid on The Children's Place," "Sammi visits the Firestation across Town," and "Sammi wants Ice Cream so she goes to Dairy Queen herself." This latest exploit shall be called: "Sammi's Great Shit Escape!"

Lil'bob is feuding with the neighbor "Motherfuckin'Roy," MFRoy for short, who is not to be confused with "our Roy," because he said "Oh, I see you finally caught her, she's been running around the neighborhood for hours now." Bob's response "Oh, well next time I see your fat curler-headed wife out on the loose, I won't bother putting her back in your yard." God, I love my sister! Such skill, really. Damn.

Going to bed, adieu.

Okay, I am a lazy ass bitch. I skipped the farmer's market, played with the dog, ate christian chicken with Rabbit and watched "not-nearly-as-gay-as-we-hoped" anime, got hit with a cherry coke bottle, smoked a lot of cigarettes, watched part of "Hottest Celebrity Girlfriends/Wives" (and now totally have a crush on Helena Christensen...and she banged Michael Hutchence a good un, so she is my hero, and if I do her, then it will be like I'm doing him, even though he is dead from the autoerotic asphyxiation...forgot my point, um, she's hot.), drank most of a two liter of cola, confessed deep dark secrets to Rabbit who will be killed instantly if she reveals them (Oh, I will so kungfu your drawerless booty!), straightened the kitchen, did a load of dishes, and am about to...drum roll...take a freaking shower (roy is not in town, and you know what that means girls...yes, my hair is secreteing its own styling product.). Later I will return to on task behaviors like: finishing bob's present, straightening the LR and DR, and maybe I'll even fold some clothes and put them away. My plans for later this evening are as follows: Midsummer' night's Dream, brand freaking new INU-YA-SHA!!!, and at 1 am...Company of Wolves (if you have not seen this movie you should, it is a beautiful and bizzare version of LIttle Red Riding hood with a creepy Angela Landsbury as the grandma...it is also totally grrl powa). All of these plans, however may be destroyed by BGN.

I need some vegetables, although maybe fried okra in hot sauce is a vegetable?

Weather is great, big storm a comin' (my kitchen window is leaking)!!! Now if only roy were here...sexified.

Later ya'll the soda in the freezer is calling my name, so is the shower. (Must get clean before Roy gets home, otherwise no love for me, just a "Damn woman! Take a shower!" like he's so great just because he's clean? Show off shower takers!)OOoh, maybe I'll take a bath...eeep.

Actually I guess I do have a job, though it is more like play...and the basement (where my favorite place, the soda machine, is) is really creepy, and I LOVE CREEPY!

Organized updates:
1. I made a present for rabbit, it is hilarious.
2. I am making a present for Miss A, it isn't hilarous, but it is cleva.
3. My baby sis is 27 today, I told her that wasn't old and she fake cried and said I was really old so what did I know? Then she asked where her present was, I told her it was at the store.
4. Roy is really dirty and perverted, so I am sad that he is leaving tommorrow...Me and Short Round (b-nut) all alone, no one to play with but the ghost cat.
5. HARRY POTTER TOMMORROW! I am totally buying it on Saturday, but from Sam's club because it's like 15 bucks.
6. The pee stick is still negative ya'll but the trying is fun.
7. Don't call me on my cell phone it will be in a canoe, with drunks, and drunk roy.
8. I am really hungry lately...I want to eat everything! Plus it's hot so I am a fat sweaty girl, lucky me.
9. Queen Chomplepopalous (aka Norma Chompsky) is being obstinate, I think I cut my tongue.
10. I think that this year everyone must bring a dismembered doll (or a gross old doll) to the halloween party.
11. I need a timer for my fog machine.
12. I can wear roy's underpants, so I guess I'm not as fat as I have been. It was not for sexy reasons, it was for walking the dog reasons. (Yeah, I walked the dog wearing only a t shirt and roy's boxer briefs...whateva, stop judging and stuff.)
13. My dog is fighting himself in the other room, and he is being noisy. He needs another doggum to play with. Ewh, he licked a wet spot on the bed again...icky.
14. I have lots of projects this weekend and I am very excited about them.
15. I am running out of things to list.
16. I didn't work out this week, I sux.
17. I need glasses.
18. My wrist is getting better.
19. My allergies are getting worse.
20. The title of the post is a song by wally pleasant...he is very cool despite being from MI. Ck him out at http://www.wallypleasant.com/music.cfm

(Don't freak, I'm not dying...I just thought it might be fun! ---yes, I realize it's a bit sick. ---no, I don't think it's morbid. ---jesus, gimme a break here!)

I, me, being of mostly sound mind and chubby (albiet hot, imho)body, do set for this, my last will and testament. After my death I would, as I have often said, like my head to be turned into a sweet candy dish. I leave the task of decorating my skull to Roy, Vicki and Allison. Roy, per his request, would like to keep my little finger, and it should be mummified so that he might keep it in his pocket. I bequeath to Bruce, provided that he does not preceed me in death, my stuffed animals and dirty underwear. If he does preceed me in death, somebody else can have the stuffed animals, but you should probebly just toss the undies, unless you really want them for some reason. Addidtionally, I would like his body/ashes/mummy/whatever to be placed with me in the ABOVE GROUND temple containing the rest of my body parts, which ya'll should build yerselves and decorate elaborately (remember I like sparkly things, and I love my doggums).
As to my massive amounts of stuff, junk, and the like. Roy gets most of it and can override anything I bequeath here after, quit bitching! Rabbit gets my Manga and my romance novel, if it is not finished, and if it is not finished she should freaking finish it! Ya'll can mud rassle over my poetry, but no matter who gets what poem ya'll better try to publish me posthumously, or I'll haunt your asses like a motherfucker. Vicki gets all of my clothes and my crafting supplies. My momma and poppy get anything they lay claim to, as long as Roy don't want it more, no arguing! My sister gets whatever she wants too, but she must also take the candy dish by my bed, and my wedding dress which is to be used for a halloween costume. Allison is in charge of divvying up any photos that Roy doesn't want, and gets first dibs on any she does want, and she gets my box of dork and "The Sword of Panthor." J-drive gets my car, because he won't drive it anyway and it's falling apart. Robin gets whatever shoes she would like from my closet. Desi gets my tarot cards...give them up Ms. A, you already have some from me...and one of my diamond earrings, which she should put in a ring someday. The other diamond earring goes to my brother, so he can wear it and be all bling. Dave gets my favorite blanket, the one with the snails and stopsigns, so he can snuggle it and cry. Roy is allowed to remarry ONLY if my bitches approve. And for god's sake somebody clean out the naughty drawer!

Also, I want a wake, with a keg, and karaoke, and baked beans. Also, someone should bury headless me in either a prom dress or a space suit in order to confuse archeologists from the future. And make sure I'm giving the thumbs up sign. Plus, I want an altar and you must worship at it at least once a year. Maybe you should start a religion around headless me? And don't fill my skull candy dish with free floating candies, they should all be individually wrapped...I suggest hershey kisses, or wintogreen lifesavers, which you could all stand around and crunch in the dark in order to give me a fireworks display (they spark when you crunch them. Try it, I'm not lying).

Any complaints should be directed to my dead ass. See ya'll in hell, suckas!

This has been the last will and testiment of ME! (Let's see a lawyer try to figure this shit out.)

With my husband...heh. How'd that happen? I have actually been blushing. Forget the sexy barista, I have a new crush. (Incidentally, this happens quite a bit; every few months, I get obsessed with the R and get all giggly. This is BAD though, I haven't been this smitten for quite a while. I AM IN DEEP SMIT.) So, if we don't answer the phone, forgive. If we don't show up to events, forgive. If we don't leave the house, we may have killed each other somehow...so check up on us.

HE is SO FREAKING HOT!(and naughty...hehe. Dammit I'm blushing again.)

what's wrong with me?

My past month, for those of you who are keeping tabs...there's like two of you, I talk to you every other day, so, really, it's just like the LOST recap that just aired; you watched it once, here are the highlights (lowlights).

1. Job is good. I like my job a lot. I work too fast. I type like rabbits hump (heh...rabbit). I have not had a regular schedule of waking/sleeping for nearly 8 years(this is the life of an unfocused, undisciplined, insomniac), and it's taking a lot longer to get used to than I expected. Here I am on week three of my easy peasy (up at 8:30, at work by 10, home again by 2ish), and it really seems difficult. Yes, I realize that this is nothing. Yes, you may make fun of me. Understand though that it has been a long time (since I was an undergrad) since I've had any structure to my days whatsoever. Structure is good. Where does all this time come from? I mean, I work, I come home and it's still only 2 something...WOW! And there's nothing to do...no grading, no planning, no required reading, no homework...I have been reading like a crazy person. My biggest obstacle now, is motivating myself to fill this extra time with useful things, rather than bad television. I will say, the structure thing is getting easier each week, by Friday I'm still fried though. The job thing is sweet.

2. Where is everyone going? You mass exodusers, I see how it is, everybody off to new and exciting places...Prague, Hattiesburg (well, that's it really, since Rabbit ain't going to Japan). I'm here, drinking a beer (ooh, I might. I just wrote it because it rhymed, but really a beer?....hmmm...I think I will), sad. SAD PITIFUL MANDIE!!!
I will miss you all as you go out in the world. Sad chapter, sad book, look at all the love though.

3. Bruce had a poop butt today, and it was extremely gross. I tricked him into a bath in the sink. While he was damp and jerrycurled, I gived him a haircut too. It's amazing how small he is when his hair's wet. He has a wee face. Now he smells lovely, like a sweet tart. Yes, he hates it.

4. Roy is a horrible sick person, with a gross little kid funk all over him. He goes to Athens, lives at Dave's and comes back with some sort of gunky rash all over his everything (except that...pervs! That would be extra grody!). And he has a bad head cold. I sent him to the Health Clinic, they say, "you have a gross little kid funk, it'll go away." Pickarhinosaurus Rosea...or something. He has a pink christmas tree on his belly. Meanwhile (zhooahahaaaa), back at Seeger headquarters, he sleeps a lot and gets grumpy easy.

5. Some girl on Oprah confronted her skinny family because they treat her like shit because she's fat. I wanted to punch her dad in the balls (I might have, if he were a man). WHO CARES? fat/skinny...whatever! It's the stupid people I want to beat with a sock full of oranges. Too bad that isn't a legal punishment for stupidity.

6. I ordered the full set of FAKE on ebay for cheapy cheap...ah boy love. Then I was embarassed to tell anyone. So, in order to get over my embarassement, I will post it on my LJ. YEAH, What chu gonna do? ("pa-pow pow").

7. Movies I have seen:
1. National Treasure...wow, at least they didn't even try for any historical accuracy. Fun though. Me likey.
2. Darkness...holy crap, that should have been scary, except that they forgot they had a plot for a half-hour somewhere in the middle. You get a scary minus.
3. Alone in the Dark...Uh. I give it an I guess. But only because there was a cool camera shot in one of the attack scenes. Look for it. It should have been good.
4. Nausicaa...why doesn't she wear pants? People are dicks. Good movie. And, partially funded by the WWF (that's world wildlife fund, not world wrestling federation...hillbillies!), I can see why.
5. Spirited Away...Dave called while we were watching this, he said he had seen it, and it was "trippy shit." I thought it was beautiful and lovely.
6. The Diary of Ellen Rimbauer and Rose Red (the miniseries)...Someone should stop Steven King. Please. I want my life back.
7. Vampire Hunter D...not bad. not bad at all. Those cartoons are freakin scary.
8. Lemony Snicket's A Series of blah diddy blah...very cute for kids and mandies. "I don't speak monkey." Sunny reminds me of my sister, only she used to bite me (mostly).
9. Star Wars 1...holy bad dialog and I hate that fucking kid. I think of this as a racist Home Alone in space, minus Macauly Caulkin's sleepy kid face. "Did I blow up the evil space ship? Oopsie!" I blow you up starwars...and I will not see your movies until they show up on TV (which is where this one was.) I wait in line for no movie...except maybe a few horror movies, but that's it dammit.
10. I'll update you on the Inuyasha movie later po tater.

That's all fer now touchy pantz.

Do notice that Roy has 99 superhero points, whereas I have like 12 or something (because I am actually pretty evil). Also, Roy and I answered the same questions, often answering completely differently (apparently Roy is a super hero who gets laid a lot...who knew?), but still got the same results. That's crazy!

I want to be Gambit!

Spiderman Congratulations! You scored a super 52%!

You're hotter than, well, hot-cakes! You've got a fan base bigger than Pam & Tommy, and to tell the truth, you actually don't mind the super-hero gig. Most of the time, anyway. Everyone seems to love their fun, friendly and courageous hero as you swoop in to save the day, time and time again! Unfortunately, swooping and day-saving doesn't help pay the rent, and you're not exactly the "hero-for-hire" type either. Hey, at least you can play down the whole life saving, self sacrificing gig with some neat lil' punchlines and remarks! Juggling both egos becomes a strain at times and whilst you want to help everyone, you're also in search of "me time", often finding yourself having to make constant personal sacrifices in order to protect those around you. Don't fret though! At the end of the day you'll find yourself with the support from either those you rescue or perhaps a close friend or loved one who'll get you by, reminding you of how cool you look in spandex.

My test tracked 1 variable How you compared to other people your age and gender: You scored higher than 99% on Heropoints

Link: The Which SUPER HERO are you Test written by crayzee69 on Ok Cupid